Source: Lemon Photo

Every Black millennial parent I know has heard some version of this phrase: “My kids turned out fine.”

It’s often delivered with a shrug, a smirk, or that trademark I’ve-been-there laugh. It’s meant to shut down conversation, to reassert authority, to wave away whatever newfangled guideline, boundary, or preference you’ve just expressed about feeding your child.

It’s very tempting to let it slide. After all, you’re probably already tired from a late-night nursing session, a sink full of pump parts, and the mental gymnastics of tracking ounces, wake windows, and developmental milestones. That “turned out fine” response is defensive, dismissive, and uninformed all at once.

When I hear it, my gut reaction is, Did they, though? I know millennials — my peers — who live with chronic gastrointestinal issues, food allergies, and autoimmune disorders. I wonder how much of that connects back to being fed table food earlier than today’s recommendations or to shifts in infant feeding norms that strayed from what science (and history) tells us is optimal.

Black Breastfeeding Week, observed from Aug. 25 to 31, is the perfect time to confront why “my kids turned out fine” isn’t the mic drop people think it is, and how bridging the gap between science and tradition can ensure our babies thrive.

RELATED CONTENT: 5 Resourceful Books To Read For Black Breastfeeding Week

Generational resistance — and where it comes from.

For many Black families, resistance to exclusive breastfeeding or extended nursing is layered with historical trauma.

“Our ancestors were expert midwives, doulas, lactation consultants, and wet nurses,” I told one friend recently. “Because those skills were exploited during slavery and beyond, we saw disassociation for a few generations. Some never learned to do it themselves.”

Like farming and other ancestral skills, lactation was commodified and weaponized against us. Enslaved Black women were often forced to feed white children while their own infants went hungry. That history calcified into cultural gaps and generational disconnects.

When a modern Black mom chooses to exclusively breastfeed, or to nurse past infancy, older relatives may not have a lived model for it. They want to be helpful, but because they didn’t do it themselves, they can’t be the “expert” in that space. That can stir up discomfort for grandmothers and other support people.

Source: Courtesy of Nichelle Clark

International Board Certified Lactation Consultant and mother of two, Nichelle Clark, has lived this dynamic firsthand.

“Chile! Them folks — and by them folks, I mean family and friends — called me all kinds of high and mighty,” she says, “just by making different choices for my children. I’ve even received it from other parents in my generation as if breastfeeding my kids was an affront to them. It comes from societal guilt and shame and class wars, but it’s still baffling every time.”

The post ‘Fine’ Isn’t The Goal — Black Breastfeeding Week Calls Us To Give Our Babies Better [Op-Ed] appeared first on MadameNoire.



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